Friday, January 30, 2009

Anxiously anticipating... F-WORD FRIDAYS!

I am cheesily excited to announce that starting next week, my hilarious and handsome and witty and mischievous f-word (you know we hate the term fiancé) is going to join us on Eat, Drink, Marry for a little something we'll be calling... F-Word Fridays.

The F-Word is hard at work brainstorming ideas for his first column, so in the meantime, let's get to know him. Here's the bio he wrote for our wedding website, which should let you in on two things:
  • He'll do anything to make me laugh

  • He never, ever exaggerates


Trevor was born in Philadelphia in 1977, and moved to Guilford, CT two years later, where he spent most of his time studying the Classics and perfecting Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture on the glockenspiel. After a shocking performance (from memory) of The Raven at his 8th grade poetry recitation, his parents felt it best to send him out to “see the world,” and as such sent the 13 year-old Trevor to The Taft School, an exclusive boarding school an agonizing 35-mile drive from the place he’d called home for 11 years.

Rather than sulk in his new and unfamiliar surroundings, Trevor set about to reshape the 100-year-old school in his own image. He would go on to letter in seven varsity sports (winning league championships in both squash and wrestling on the same day as a sophomore), successfully rig the election that saw his roommate chosen as student body president, and write most of Taft graduate Mary Chapin-Carpenter’s 1992 quadruple platinum album Come On Come On. In the winter of his senior year, he took up ice hockey in an ill-advised effort to impress a pretty, young English teacher from Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan. His love would remain unrequited, (and let's be honest, what with the litigation, the notoriety, his deportation to Canada and that country's subsequent refusal to accept him...well let's just say it was a lot for any 17-yr-old to handle), yet his newfound hobby would provide the next direction in the precocious young man’s life.

Still far too tall and skinny for his own good, Trevor left Connecticut after graduating, embarking on a 1-year spiritual journey composed entirely of playing hockey and organizing mortgage files in Waterloo, Iowa. He then parlayed his hawk eye experiences into acceptance at Yale, erroneously claiming that being a 5th generation legacy had nothing to do with his getting in. There he majored in hockey, beer, and co-eds, graduating in 2000 with the predictable degree in….wait for it….political science! He is not, nor has he ever been, a member of Skull and Bones. So far as you know.

After spending 5 uneventful years in Dallas as procurer of “goods and services” for the Dallas Cowboys, Trevor made a stunning debut into American politics by single-handedly engineering the 2006 Democratic takeover of the House of Representatives from his 1-bedroom apartment in Albuquerque, New Mexico. His time in the Land of Enchantment was not all business, however. It was there he met the love of his life, a fiery young brunette named Maggie Mae. Several trips to various beaches, sushi restaurants, and strip clubs later, Maggie agreed to marry Trevor, so long as he gave her the famous Hope Diamond for their engagement. He did.

Unlike most grooms, Trevor has taken an active role in planning his impending nuptials. “Having done very little creatively other than invent most of the previous 4 paragraphs, I’m looking forward to seeing my creative vision come to life," says Trevor. “Not to give away too much, but think Albert Speer-meets-Pablo Picasso, only with lots of pretty flowers and bright silks. Exciting, right?”

1 comment:

Heather the bridesmaid said...

Can't wait!!